20.2.05
happy fucking 'birthday', bitch.

ah.
i never thought
i would actually live
to see this day again.
i had,
in fact,
planned not to.
but no.
i sit here
and see your face,
your fucking face
with your little fucking
half smile
that took my fucking breath
away.
you never gave it back either.
you stole
and stole
and stole
from me.
my heart,
my mind,
my very fucking being.
and then,
you gave me one thing.
your rejection.
you made me believe
i was forgiven.
my hopes,
though shot to hell,
reassembled one last time,
and flew because
i was so sure you loved me again.
and then you
shot
me
down.
its a fucking long way down
from your pedestal
of acceptance,
reputation,
and cold,
hard,
ice.
hm.
seems to resemble your heart a bit.
its a long way down from there,
dear.
care to fall?
oh wait,
no,
you dont fall.
you throw people off it.
you cant have them
staining your throne
with the blood and tears
of the broken hearted.
sorry.
forgot.
today,
a year ago,
you severed all connections.
you severed my connection.
i cried
for fucking
6 hours that day,
goddammit.
6 hours of my life,
no, more than that...
wasted.
crying for you.
at you.
because of you.
you needed some space?
you hadnt fucking spoken to me
in 2 months.
i waited for you
for 2 months.
i was not waiting for this.
this spike in my heart.
you killed me.
you killed me
448 times,
as of today.
four hundred
and forty eight
fucking
times
youve driven that knife
deeper in my heart.
and im done.
i cant even deal with you
anymore.
fuck you.
im done.
i have to keep telling myself
that you are so not worth this.

---------but the part that still worries me
-------------------is that maybe you are...


-jo.

bleeding inside since
22:04

0 comments:

0 struck matches.

# archivage.

10.04
11.04
12.04
01.05
02.05
03.05
04.05
05.05
06.05
07.05
08.05
09.05
10.05
11.05
12.05
01.06
02.06
03.06
04.06
07.06
11.09


# linkage.
aaron.
alltheworldtonothing.
bad poets society.
ben.
dani.
the end is near.
i dont own emotion. i rent.
jooutthewindow.
never ending story.
the nightjar.
lonely for the last time.
rosiebc6.
saccharinity.
second chances. from $26 995.
set my heart alight.
soph.
suicidiaries.

# bitch here.



# rules.
yes, sadly, there are rules. just cause im a control freak and i like our blog looking all nice. so. numero uno. no capitalization. unless it is absolutely necessary to the structure of your poem, no one wants to see it. numero dos. no apostrophes. i hate them, and theyre stupid. numero tres. no spelling errors. sorry for those of you who are slightly illiterate. but its hard to read poetry if it is fricking spelled wrong. numero quatro. sign your poems. ill take credit for them otherwise...*evil grin*. awesome. other than that, nothing else so far. you can use whatever font/size you want. any type of poem. etc. thank you.

# us.
name: jordan.
age: 15.
called: jo, dino, jooutthewindow, georgia.
contact: beckham2590@hotmail.com

awesome.

pastimes: writing, drawing, soccer, rowing, swimming, cello.
people: you know who you are.

not so much.

people: you know who you are.
things: juniper bushes, society, life. probably you, too.

music.

artist: green day, linkin park, jimmy eat world, evanescence, autopilot off, blink-182, simple plan, etc.

name: danielle.
age: 15.
called: dani, t-rex, daniel, wingy, doneal*a*thon, psycho.
contact: winged-one@comcast.net

awesome.

pastimes: soccer, wakeboarding, music.
people: not me.

not so much.

people: boys(lol, most but not all), he who must not be named.

music.

artist: korn, linkin park, staind, strata, disturbed.

name: dorota.
age: 17.
called: dorota, d, dorito, roacha...basically anything.
contact: kurczaczek91@hotmail.com

awesome.

pastimes: rowing, swimming, viola, reading, just chilling and shaking my booty.
people: everyone who is nice and not michelle tillman.

not so much.

people: michelle tillman and all those bitchy whores out there.
things: sharks, jellyfish, and seaweed.

music.

artist: anyone.

name: bailey.
age: 16.
called: bay, bail, foomelody, crack whore.
contact: sportsgirlmidfield@hotmail.com

awesome.

pastimes: soccer, poetry, rocking out, people watching.
people: anyone who doesnt piss me off right away.

not so much.

people: anyone with a bad aura.
things: not being able to breathe under the covers.

music.

artist: foofighters, queens of the stone age, nirvana, black rebel motorcycle club, and many many others.

name: sophie.
age: 15.
called: sophsta, fefe, soph, soapie, the list goes on.
contact: wicked_lemons@yahoo.com

awesome.

pastimes: writing, art.
people: david bowie.

not so much.

people: pretentious people, and idiots who think theyre smart. theyre not.
things: math and spelling.

music.

artist: placebo, david bowie, new order, joy division, and the yeah yeah yeahs.

name: ben.
age: 15.
called: ben.
contact: Nerdsworld5643@aol.com

awesome.

pastimes: violin, reading, hanging out.
people: mes amis.

not so much.

people: no idea.
things: bananas.

music.

artist: anyone.

name: aaron.
age: 14.
called: aaron, asshole, raisin, furtard(why thats been extended to me, god only knows) whatever you want.
contact: newbluechampion666@hotmail.com.

awesome.

pastimes: baseball, sleeping, procrastinating, poeming.
people: who knows.

not so much.

people: The list is at 5 pages.
things: stairs, and broken headphones.

music.

artist: (this is gonna be long) everclear, cradle of filth, marilyn manson, metallica, linkin park, AFI, dave matthews band, everlast, spearhead, yellowcard.

name: michael.
age: 15.
called: evoldous, psycho child.
contact: mbhultman@msn.com.

awesome.

pastimes: skateboarding(is it a past time?).
people: danzaver, brixius, gabby, dan-yell, you know, all those people.

not so much.

people: i dont know, that one kid that wants to kill me.
things: those scion cars, they look like boxes.

music.

artist: icp, twiztid, marcy playground, kotton mouth kings, they might be giants, nirvana, metallica, more...


# credits
picture by jo.
layout by roxy_belle.